Getting Through It

I hate that I vented in my last post, but I was just keeping things real. Everything isn't always wonderful and I want to remember that when I look back through my posts. (Since I've had this blog awhile, I love going back and reading old posts.) Sometimes life gets tough, and I almost titled this post, "Getting Over It," but that's not what we do. We don't "get over things." We take each experience and use it to shape who we are afterwards. We don't have things happen and then forget they ever happened. We work through things. We learn. We struggle. We pray. We work. We make it through. And that's what I'm doing. Sure, it's tough being a mother, a wife, a daughter, granddaughter, sister, aunt, a friend. But I don't want to get over any of those roles. I want to continue those roles and enjoy the path that I'm on.

The last post helped me to remind myself to look at what I've been blessed with and I've enjoyed listening to a dear young lady (actually a former student) sing a song entitled, "I Have Been Blessed." If you have a chance, you should give it a listen.

And special thanks to my friend, Renee, for reminding me of the following scripture:
And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
2 Corinthians 12:9

Overwhelmed

Warning: This isn't a fun, life is going hunky dory post. Just in case the title didn't give it away.

I'm vaguely aware of the fact that Mother's Day is Sunday. I probably wouldn't think too much of it, but my sister called wanting to know what I'm getting our mom. Ummmm....I have no idea. Nor do I know what I'm getting any of the other mothers in our lives. What's Mother's Day got to do with this post? Glad you ask. Mother's Day is a day to honor the women who helped make us who we are, the women who made all the sacrifices look easy, the women who would gladly go back and do it all again, even knowing what they know now. But I haven't been feeling worthy of the honor. I haven't been doing so well with all the "motherly" things. I'm overwhelmed and feel like I'm going under.

The kids aren't listening. I have to repeat myself 439 times to get my point across, but by the 15th time I'm yelling and red-faced. Ezra almost refuses to wear a diaper....or go to the potty. I'm tired of cleaning crap up, literally. Ethan is in some sort of weird funk...he's bossy and mean and I can't get him to open up to me about it. Elijah thinks he's a big kid and yet, still wants to be a baby and therefore, I clean up more crap, again literally.

My house is a disaster. I haven't felt like cleaning and apparently no one else who lives here full-time does either. (I don't include Ronnie because he's rarely here and most of the mess isn't his. His biggest mess is a suitcase of dirty clothes to wash every weekend, but I didn't even have to touch that last week.)

The laundry is still piled up from the great washing machine fail and I just can't seem to catch up. Then I can't find the laundry detergent I like anywhere around here. Errrr.

The dishes are piled up, but I can't stand at the sink to wash them because I feel like there's a baby about to fall out from the pressure. Plus there's the whole awkward stance thing since this belly keeps me from actually getting close to the sink.

Then there's the fact that the responsibility of cleaning my grandmother's apartment out has fallen to me and my mom. Cleaning 10 years of a pack rat's junk is definitely not fun. (One would think that seeing all of her junk would motivate me to clean, but it just makes me tired.

Then the nurse from my OB office called today to tell me that I failed my glucola test. Miserably. And that I need to do the three hour test. Unless I think I'll fail it too. Guess what? I'll fail it. So monitoring begins immediately. Except when I got to the pharmacy to get my supplies, the doctor hadn't called them in yet.

And those are the big things. There are so many little things irritating me here lately....like every single little thing. I've been in situations that were far more stressful and felt fine. Why am I going crazy now? I pray its just hormones and goes away soon.

Why did I post this? To show that life isn't always perfect. My kids aren't perfect. I'm not perfect. Also, I needed to get it all off of my chest and didn't want to get to the point that I was emailing Ronnie to please come home because every time I talked to him on the phone all I could do was cry.

And because once I got it all typed out I started realizing my blessings. And that's where I needed to get. My kids are healthy. They are all boy and keep me on my toes. I'm experiencing a (mostly) healthy pregnancy and I have great doctors who are watching out for me and Baby Girl. I'm fortunate to have a home and all kinds of junk to go in it. We have clothes to wear, food to eat and love to share. I'm lucky to still have a mom and grandmas, even though they all can drive me crazy to a point. My mama sleeps late, but she always has food to share. Gram Jackie is always asking me favors, but I'm so blessed that she'll call me anytime she needs anything. I probably know her better than any of the other grandchildren and my boys love their "old" grandma beyond words. I'm blessed that my Grandma Summerlin knew my name yesterday. She called me by it at least twice and it made me want to cry. (Never mind the fact that she asked about me being fat (pregnant) five times in as many minutes. I'm blessed with a hard-working husband who does all that he can for me on the days that he is home. And I have a God in Heaven who is watching over me and reminding me not to worry so much because He is still in control.      

Baby Update!

I've been meaning to post an update, but there really isn't much going on. But that's a good thing! Since the ultrasound, I've had 2 appointments, 20 and 24 weeks.

At the 20 week appointment, I did a 1 hour glucola test. I dreaded it. When I got to the office the ladies at the front didn't know anything about it, so I thought I may get to skip it. No such luck. One lady looked up while on the phone and asked the famous question, "Orange or fruit punch?" Ugh. )I always get orange because red foods/drinks give me headaches.) The lab tech brought me my drink and it was stinkin' fruit punch!  What's a girl to do? I put on my big girl panties and guzzled it down to wait my hour.

I went in for my appointment with the OB, a new woman, and everything looked great. Baby's heartbeat is strong, She said I was okay with my weight and asked if I had any questions. I mentioned my sinus issues and that my ear had been bothering me so she checked it out and wrote me a prescription for an antibiotic.

I went back to finish my one hour wait and then had a finger prick, a "You passed!" and I was on my way for another month. (I was ecstatic since that was the first glucola I had passed since I was pregnant with Ethan!)

*  *  *

Four weeks later I returned, accompanied by Ronnie for the first time. Yay! I hate going by myself. The whole appointment didn't last 20 minutes, but I got upset because I had gained SEVEN pounds in those four weeks.I still don't know what happened, but God bless that doctor (same new lady), she didn't mention a word about weight. I could have hugged her for that! She did re-check my ear, but I couldn't help myself. I started laughing and she asked if I was okay. I told her I was, but I was the only person I know who goes to the gynecologist to get my ears checked. That's when I found out she has a sense of humor, thankfully.

The heartbeat and everything else was good and she sent me on my way for four more weeks, when I'm scheduled for the normal glucose test.

I have an appointment Friday, so I'm praying that I pass and that everything looks good with baby!

*  *  *

Pregnancy Brain

Seems that this phenomenom has been rearing its ugly head with me lately. I'll just use the past 24 hours as an example. 

After attending a play at Ethan's school yesterday, I helped Grandma take a quilt to the Senior Center and took a quick trip to WalMart. Upon leaving the store, I couldn't find my van. I walked around the parking lot for 10 minutes (not even exaggerating, wish I was) with 2 babies in the cart before I finally found it. 

Yesterday afternoon, Ezra unplugged my alarm clock. I re-set it before church so I wouldn't have to worry about it at bedtime. When I went to bed, I set the alarm so I could get Ethan up and to the bus on time. This morning I hear Ezra moving around, and when I open my eyes discover the sun is up and the birds are chirping and its 7.30 rather than 6.00. Looking at the clock, I think that I never even heard it go off. Upon further checking, I realized that I got my a.m. and p.m. mixed up last night and my alarm won't go off until 6.00 this evening. 

Oh well. Two and a half months and I won't be pregnant anymore. 

It's Gonna Take Surrender

My word for 2013 is faith. I've been having to constantly remind myself that God is in control and that I have to trust Him. I seem to struggle daily. The words to this song by Steel Bridge help me and I hope they help you too.

Accountability

Operation: Let's Get This House Organized/Clean/Less Cluttered is underway!

I'm thinking if maybe I blog my progress that I will get more accomplished? Hold myself accountable, per say? (I don't know how to spell per say.) I just know that I'm tired of trying (and failing) to control this cluttered mess and I'm in a weird spring cleaning/nesting phase so I'm going to go with it while I can!

I'm working on a post for toys and will get to one on clothing. Then we'll see where this goes.

**Renee, you better make me stick to this!**

  

Homemade Stuffed Animal 'Chain Gang'

If you have children, you have stuffed animals. They start to get them as gifts before they're even born. And then they multiply in your children's rooms until you want to pull your hair out! No, maybe not. But when you have a husband who thinks the claw machines are the ultimate challenge and plays them anytime he's out with the kids, then they seem to multiply. And Heaven forbid that you try to get rid of one. Your kid will know exactly where it came from, what he was doing when he received it (or Daddy won it) and then proceed to tell you all the memories associated with the animal.

Really, I guess my kids don't have too many, not for three boys anyways, but I was just not finding a way to store them that suited us. I had them in a tote. But the kids would throw them all around the room and play in the tote. Then Daddy took the tote for something else. We had them in the toy box, but they took up too much valuable space. Most of the time they just floated around the room and I was tired of seeing them strewn everywhere. So I started researching my options.

Toy hammock 

Okay, I had one when I was a kid. I remember wanting a toy, climbing to get it, deciding to dump the whole thing, then not wanting to get them back to the ceiling so I didn't utilize the hammock, rendering it useless. I saw the ideas where people hang them lower on the walls, but I needed something more vertical since we'll have two kids in each room soon and we'll need all the space we can get.

The Animal Zoo

Honestly, the idea is good, but I think it's tacky. It takes up quite a bit of floor space and I wonder how sturdy it is.

Bean bags

 

I found some bean bag type chairs that you can put the stuffed animals in, but right now I really don't know what color I want. I'm still deciding how to decorate this room. I know, what a problem.

Then I found the Stuffed Animal Chain Gang. When I think of a chain gang, I think of the prisoners back in the day that were assigned various work duties outside of their bars, working together in a long line, connected by chains.

I'd never heard of a chain gang for stuffed animals. I'm sure you can imagine the mental picture I got when I saw those words, right? But this was exactly what I was looking for! I found it on amazon for $9.99, but when I went back to show it to Ronnie, the price had increased. Being the hopeful DIYers that we are, we schemed about the items we could buy to make it ourselves.

This is what I came home with: a 15' dog chain (I couldn't find a plastic chain at my Wal-Mart and this was actually the cheaper, sturdier option.) and some multi-purpose hanger clips I found in the laundry section. The original idea was clothespins and some sort of hook to connect the pin to the chain. These clips worked for both items.

The chain was $5.97 and the clips were $2.97 per bag. So I spent about $12, but we can cut the chain in two and have one for each room, but I'd probably buy another bag or two of clips so it'd be $18 for two chain gangs. I also used an eye hook to attach it to the ceiling. Actually Ronnie did that, but that's all I had him do since I didn't need to balance on the table he did to attach it. I'm a little "front heavy" these days.

Our final project! I'm pretty proud of it! The animals are off the floor, they are visible and they don't take up much space! 

   

Are we there yet?

You know how annoying it is when you're going anywhere and all you hear from the backseat is, "Are we there yet?" Apparently we can be going somewhere five minutes from home and yet, to the kid in the backseat, it seems like we'll never arrive.

I'm that kid. Inside my head I'm screaming, "Are we freakin' there yet?" Except we're not going anywhere. We're holed up at home because everyone is sick.

Let me preface this by saying that when I worked in a school with germ-ridden teens everyday we were a pretty healthy family. I guess my immune system was pretty tough and I brought home just enough grossness to build up the immunities of the boys and we were good to go. Quit my job and all of a sudden my family turns into some of the sickest people I know. (Don't quote my science there because, well, it's probably not very factual.)

So a couple of weeks ago Ezra started throwing up out of the blue at an ungodly hour in the morning. Great. I did the loving mama thing and he was all better when he woke up later in the morning. But then the next day, it hit me. I was so sick I couldn't function - and I had three kids to take care of alone. Not an hour later, Elijah got it too. We were a hot mess. And Bless Ethan's heart, he was doing his best to take care of us. Everyone finally made it to bed and it hit Ethan. I was sick and taking care of sick boys and one wild toddler.

No problem. I'm a tough chick. I can handle it.

But.........

This past Saturday was beautiful! We ran all of our errands together with the windows down, we played at a park while we waited to meet someone, we even grilled out for supper.

While he was cooking, Ronnie started to feel "not quite right." Hmmmm. By early morning I could hear him in the bathroom and it didn't sound pleasant. His fever would go up and then break just to go back up again. He was achy, he slept a lot and he looked like crud. This went on all day. Monday he got up and left for work. Soon after the sun came up I heard a truck outside and there was my husband, looking worse than before. He ended up staying in bed all day Monday and Tuesday. Wednesday he moved to the recliner. I hated him being sick, but it was manageable.

Tuesday, again at some ungodly hour (I don't do interrupted sleep very well.), Ronnie brought Elijah to me. The child was on fire. Where's the thermometer? Nowhere to be found, of course. Tylenol it is. I've got this. All day long his fever would go up. I'd do Tylenol and a cool bath. Or Tylenol and a damp washcloth. Remind him not to bundle up in his blanket. All he did was lay around. I felt so helpless. Wednesday he woke and exclaimed, "Me feel gwate!" Awesome, kid. Why are you still running a fever?

By Thursday morning, I had had it with Elijah's fever. Got an appointment for him and off we went to the doctor. Lucky little guy had an ear infection, flu and strep. Gross. I felt bad for not taking him sooner, but he said he felt great. Oh well. Luckily, the doctor took mercy on me and when I mentioned that I'd be seeing her next week for a brother, she wrote prescriptions for Tamiflu for both of them! Awesome and thank you!

After hearing all this, Ronnie decided to go ahead and get an appointment. Yes, he suffered all week, but he knows how to use the phone as well as I do.

He went to the doctor Friday morning and got the same diagnosis, minus the ear infection.

But wait! There's more! When Ethan got home Thursday he told me his throat was hurting. Say what? Kid, you have got to be kidding me? I brushed it off until Friday morning when he woke up crying that it hurt so bad that I told him to go back to bed rather than go to school. I made him an appointment and he tested positive for strep too. Joy.

Needless to say, we've been on quarantine for a week now. And I'm going a little crazy. I keep wondering when the other shoe is going to drop and either Ezra or myself will be sick, but so far it hasn't happened.

Are we there yet? Are we all healthy enough to go out in public?